[AAYi Fashion][AAYi Fashion]Attention men: Make this Valentine's Day a little more intimate.
[AAYi Fashion][AAYi Fashion]"Women will always be happy with lingerie," says Rhonda Shear, owner of Rhonda Shear Intimates and HSN's lingerie queen. "They also want chocolate and flowers and jewelry, but lingerie goes with Valentine's Day because it is a day that's about love and romance."
[AAYi Fashion][AAYi Fashion]Where guys make the biggest mistake is not being informed before going into a lingerie store, says Shear, the former host of "USA: Up All Night."
[AAYi Fashion][AAYi Fashion]Often, she says, men will walk into a store and point to a saleswoman and say, "She's the same size as you."
"Most sales people understand that, and realize an item most likely will be coming back," Shear says.
Men who want to get it right should sneak a peek into her lingerie drawer or closet to get sizes, experts recommend. And make sure it is something she is currently wearing, because women tend to keep multiple sizes.
"Don't go with 1-minute lingerie," Shear says. "Lingerie that is on 1 minute and then off in the next minute, and that she most likely won't ever wear again. But most other classic lingerie will make her happy and guarantee a good night."
A pair of classy panties, a gift card and a red rose is a fabulous gift, Shear says.
For those who choose to go with lace or frills, know your woman.
If you have just started dating, lingerie is probably not the best choice of Valentine's gift, says Erin Schachter of Squirrel Hill. For those in established relationships, she says, "Buy for her and what she likes -- not what you like."
"My husband Todd knows what I like," she says, "and he knows I am not a nightgown kind of girl."
Don't be too cliche either, Schachter says. "The item doesn't have to be pink or red just because it is Valentine's Day. I like black and nude shades. I think a red pair of underwear is too cheesy."
Make sure the item can be hand- or machine-washed instead of dry-cleaned.
Stores often will keep a woman's sizes on record. That's what Gail Gross, owner of The Pussycat in Squirrel Hill, does. It is important to know both top and bottom sizes, she says.
"Women have to feel comfortable with what they are wearing, or they won't wear it," Gross says. "Make sure you buy something tasteful."
Tom Cimarolli of Peters enjoys buying lingerie for his wife, Kelli, at The Pussycat.
"When women have pretty things, they feel better about themselves," he says. "I try to pay attention to what she likes. I might not always hit a home run with what I have bought her, but a single, double or triple is as good as a home run."
Not every guy has Cimarolli's zest for lingerie shopping, so don't try to do too much too fast, experts say.
"A lot of it depends on the woman and what her style is," says Ilene Levy, owner of Cheeks.
Don't be too risky.
"You need to know what women feel most comfortable in, because you want them to wear it and not just (let it) sit in the box," says Lauren Borish, director of sales for OnGossamer and Betsey Johnson Intimates.
Jessica Heinrichs of Plum agrees.
"I would rather have a gift that I can wear more than once," she says. "See what your girlfriend or wife or significant other is currently wearing. And if you aren't sure, ask one of her girlfriends what she likes, because she will know ... girls talk about that stuff."
Don't forget other amenities that can treat her, such as a silk sleep mask, bath salts, massage oils and candles, says Alicia Vargo, founder and CEO of Pampered Passions Fine Lingerie in Colorado.
"Don't be afraid to ask questions of a lingerie professional," Vargo says. "Give the person your loved one's height, weight and bust size, even hair and eye color. ... Sizing is very important. I know some men are apprehensive when selecting anything above a medium in size, in case they might offend their mate. Purchase the large, and then blame the salesperson.
"Nothing is worse than having her try something on that is too small, especially if she is concerned about her figure," Vargo says. "If your mate is conscientious about her figure, let the salesperson know, and you both can pick out something that may hide her stomach area, enhance her bust area if she is small-chested, or a flowy item if she is concerned about her hips and thighs."
Jessica Wells, Soma's fit and style expert, says to take the time to find something that reflects your significant other's personality and style.
"There is nothing more attractive than confidence, so try to stay within her comfort zone and aim to find styles that make her look and feel gorgeous."
She suggests considering what your woman typically buys herself. "Does she wear a certain style of bra, panty or sleepwear? If so, look for a similar style, but choose a romantic, lacy version," she says.
Or go the safe route.
"Surprise her with a trip to the lingerie boutique," Wells says. "Go together and have her choose what she loves. You'll get a better idea of what she feels most sensual and beautiful wearing."
